Excerpts from the lash

10th June '12

My heart is missing
and I cannot breathe
I'm living, not dead yet.
why me? why you? why us?
I ask myself, you and the darkness
no answers yet. no light yet.
I'm zigzagging through the world, the tasks
while I'm shattering into pieces.
I'm trying to hold myself together
but the pieces are lost.
I wonder again. Am I sure? Could this be me? Alive.
I pinch myself, I bite myself, I feel it.
I must be living.
Then how come I feel like dead?

morning sunshine
happy sunshine
sunshine showers
sunshine yellow
rainbow sunshine
lovely sunshine
lifegiving sunshine
too much sunshine
warm sunshine
sunshine, too hot
I'm burning sunshine
ashes full of sunshine

Something is moving inside me.
Something, Someone is there
Otherwise how could I have handled it till now?
Something is alive, which is helping me function,
Write, do things, talk.
'Hello, Something Someone inside me
Please take over, completely
I can't carry on

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